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Permission to relax: Why Shyam Bhat wants founders to be easy on themselves


In India’s pressure-cooker startup ecosystem, where funding rounds and growth metrics define success, psychiatrist Shyam Bhat is advocating for something radical: permission to relax. As founder of Nirvikalpa: The Mind-Body Centre and Chairperson of Live Love Laugh, he’s seeing a troubling pattern among ambitious founders–and it’s not their work ethic.

The problem, Bhat explains during a conversation with YourStory‘s Founder and CEO Shradha Sharma, lies in how modern entrepreneurs view themselves.

“The contemporary ideas of self-worth and self-respect—the American narratives—lead to situations where people become self-obsessed. That’s a trap,” he says, pointing to the constant noise of social media and the relentless pressure to project success.

“(Self) awareness will liberate you from thinking about yourself, and instead, allow you to be in flow all the time… where there is great ease between who you are and what life throws at you,” he added. 

During the conversation with Shradha Sharma, Bhat dove deep into how entrepreneurs can measure their success and remain happy, laying emphasis on the need of the hour—therapy for all

Measuring oneself

Addressing the pressure that young entrepreneurs seem to put on themselves—to follow one’s passion, be confident, and have a clear vision right from the beginning—has led to a situation where people are unable to delay gratification. “They believe that if one doesn’t succeed early, then they are not destined for success,” he said. 

To build a successful life, Bhat emphasised, one should focus on finding something that one can invest their time on. “Don’t wait for passion… focus on finding something that you least dislike and spend enough time on mastering it, then success is inevitable in today’s world.”  

Additionally, Bhat said that while many young people believe that they need to be confident to achieve success, it is usually the other way around—you get confidence from your success. “Achievers are always plagued by under-confidence at the early stages of their career. They have the ability to learn which comes from the belief that they don’t know everything,” he added. 

Therapy for all

The journey towards self-awareness and maintaining peace of mind in a world that constantly highlights what we lack requires intentional effort. It involves working on ourselves, engaging in self-discovery, and committing to personal growth—which can be significantly attained through therapy. 

“Therapy shouldn’t be seen from a trauma-informed perspective. Instead, therapy should be looked at as a means to discover oneself and grow,” Bhat said.  

But how will one know if they need therapy? 

“If you are dealing with other people, and living or trying to navigate in today’s extremely complex world, you need therapy,” Bhat explained. He compared seeking therapy to working out in a gym, except, it is like working with a personal trainer who helps one discover themselves better. 

However, he clarified, a therapist will not direct one what to do. “Their job is not to solve your problems, but to allow you to discover yourself so that you have the tools to solve your own problems.” 

He also pointed out that people are often unaware that they hold themselves back, believing that something has to happen—purchasing the next big house, receiving an award to quantify their success, or even raising funds for their next big startup—to let go and be happy. 

As a professional psychiatrist, he advised that in such situations one should pause and ask themselves how they are feeling. “If you are not happy, or are feeling stressed, ask yourself if you can accept yourself and your life in that particular moment, and do you give yourself the permission to be happy in that moment.” And the right way to do that, he suggested, is by reminding oneself to not wait for their problems to be solved, “Nothing is ever going to be perfect.”

“You are always happy, and you are okay in this moment, even if you don’t know that… You are nothing and everything in this moment. There is no story you can tell yourself without the past and future. And without a story, it is not emptiness; it is freedom and liberation,” Bhat concluded. 





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